tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post303189348701421644..comments2024-03-14T03:16:23.482-05:00Comments on Everyone Needs Therapy: Angry, did you say?therapydochttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-83262686086951275452012-06-11T02:43:38.970-05:002012-06-11T02:43:38.970-05:00Anger is a strong expression if our inner self, a...Anger is a strong expression if our inner self, and can be highly dangerous. I agree that it motivates to nothing more than positively. That's why I really treasure advises that says like when I get angry, i'ts better to just walk away and breathe deeply.Therapy Websiteshttp://therapist-websites.websyourway.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-27592359596288599902009-06-10T18:22:45.525-05:002009-06-10T18:22:45.525-05:00Ahh, thank you for that. I can breathe again.Ahh, thank you for that. I can breathe again.Lisanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-71253946219563810372009-06-09T19:48:58.968-05:002009-06-09T19:48:58.968-05:00Well ya' know, anger's the enemy.
I can o...Well ya' know, anger's the enemy.<br /><br />I can only speak hypothetically, of course, but with teenagers I never let them know what I'm thinking, not unless it's absolutely necessary. I'm always ferreting out why they feel the way they feel, listening hard, trying to get at what is really underneath the emotion. Often the anger is at a parent, but sometimes it's just free-floating, too much energy, no place for it to go, displaced upon the closest available, ready and willing object.<br /><br />So fight about something like this because there's a principle that needs to be taught? Well, you lose it in the fight, is for sure. Teens and young adults are dying to be valued, to be right, and even if they aren't, need to be heard. Let them decide that what they're supporting isn't worth it. They're not stupid.<br /><br />But they won't get there over night. Welcome to parenting young adults, is what they'll tell you.therapydochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-15749831850804407432009-06-09T19:09:21.517-05:002009-06-09T19:09:21.517-05:00I don't know if comments are still posting her...I don't know if comments are still posting here, but I'm not sure where to put this. I'm writing this as a mom, a therapist, and the daughter of a police officer. (He's been dead for years). Comments are appreciated as I'm struggling with this, big time.<br />Reader's Digest version:<br />We live in a college town. Good school system, all of that. Recently, an all state football player who had graduated from high school two weeks prior had a big party at his house. By big, I mean 100 kids showed up. Mine was one of them. I've never liked this kid. I've always known he's had rage issues. He's fine if he likes you, but get on his wrong side, and he's animalistic in his anger outbursts. He's also been a bully (peeing in kids lockers in middle school.) He also has never had any respect for authority...surprise, surprise...<br />Anyway, the police get called at this party. Two officers show up, and I guess in the officer's naievity, sticks his foot in the door. Apparently, this is not allowed as there was no warrant and the cop was not invited in. This football player kid, slams the door on the cop's foot, which causes problems. The cops then force their way in. The kid who is HUGE, takes the cop's radio, takes the taser, and taser's the cop. He then takes the cop down to the ground. Then the kid attempts to run. At this point, the gun is pulled and they body slam the kid to the ground. His shoulder is hurt, and he is bleeding from the mouth. Still, he is mouthing off. He has been in jail for 5 days, and is now of course, in big trouble. My son, and many others in this community, are OUTRAGED at the policemen, who they say belittled this young man, and laughed that he almost got killed. I am appalled and worried that my son's thinking is not in the realm of respecting authority, but is protecting his friend's (and yes he calls him a friend's RAGE.) He does not support the rage,and agrees the kid was in the wrong. but he thinks the cops reacted poorly to the rage. I say, as soon as the cops knocked on the door, everyone needed to be saying "how can I help you sir?" This kid's rage is obviously deep seated, and there are TONS of family issues. But they have a good "lawyer" who will probably get him off on the technicality that the police were in the wrong. Anger, you say? Why, yes. I'm overflowing with anger, confusion, wondering if I should really worry about my own kid's thought processes, or if this other kid's rage, though, out of line, caused a chain reaction in the policeman. I walk around with a lump in my throat due to this rage. This just happened a few days ago, and it's the big talk. It's causing a huge wedge between me and my 18 year old son. Is my own anger that I can't seem to squelch just as bad????? And the policeman's? I fear someone is going to scream "rodney King" or something!Lisanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-32144553600871467912008-06-02T15:30:00.000-05:002008-06-02T15:30:00.000-05:00Excellent article and thank you for such an inform...Excellent article and thank you for such an informative blog!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-71311417810309445142007-07-16T15:16:00.000-05:002007-07-16T15:16:00.000-05:00It did sound a little familiar.It's great to have ...It did sound a little familiar.<BR/><BR/>It's great to have comments like yours because you provide anecdotal data that supports the things I've learned in practice and/or sifting through the research.<BR/><BR/>Glad to hear you're with a great doc, ANON.therapydochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-58050143253041916722007-07-16T14:44:00.000-05:002007-07-16T14:44:00.000-05:00This is anon (cough, anon) at 11:02pm again...Yes,...This is anon (cough, <I>anon</I>) at 11:02pm again...<BR/><BR/>Yes, I will definitely echo what you said: "Always take drugs/go off drugs under the supervision of a medical doctor." Esp. when dealing with Effexor! Scary. It's all relative. For example, a traumatic c-section cured me of my fear of the dentist. (!)<BR/><BR/>Don't worry, I am under the care of an excellent psychiatrist at a major teaching hospital, and a therapist with a doctorate too (not yourself, too bad for me!) who takes on long term bpd cases everyone else runs from...! <BR/><BR/>BTW the reason why you thought that was a great synopsis, is because I copied and pasted yours! ;)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-22193248240746283002007-07-16T13:17:00.000-05:002007-07-16T13:17:00.000-05:00This comment has been removed by the author.therapydochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-82520763724573955182007-07-16T12:46:00.000-05:002007-07-16T12:46:00.000-05:00This comment has been removed by the author.have popcorn will lurkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03200484265589054583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-67034132532739774242007-07-16T05:50:00.000-05:002007-07-16T05:50:00.000-05:00Great synopsis of the case. I have absolutely no ...Great synopsis of the case. I have absolutely no idea who you are and DH, G-d bless him, knows this by now if you've ever seen me, right? <BR/><BR/>Cases like Reg and Renata, as all you've all figured out by now, are textbook.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for writing. I've always worried about people on Effexor for that reason, it's hard to quit. But sure, when these meds work, there's nothing like them if you really need to make a change in how you feel quickly.<BR/><BR/>But everyone's different. Always take drugs/go off drugs under the supervision of a medical doctor.therapydochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-69114126730028244452007-07-16T00:02:00.000-05:002007-07-16T00:02:00.000-05:00Long story long in Ranata’s case we know that her ...<I>Long story long in Ranata’s case we know that her anger is really about being frustrated and shut down, powerless with her father who gave permission to be angry. She’s aware that being frustrated in her relationships is dangerous and tends to culminate in verbal violence.</I><BR/><BR/>Wow, did I really tell you about my past (it wasn't my dad though) and BTW my name is not Renata...<BR/><BR/>Eh, I mostly threw the kids' toys. They never landed anywhere near DH. I don't do that anymore, but he never understood (and I told him a few times) that if I MEANT to bean him with one, I would have!<BR/><BR/>Interestingly, I went cold turkey off Wellbutrin last week (300 mg, due to sucidal ideation, bad, very bad) and I've had some dizziness and double vision, otherwise nothing. OTOH, I've tried to go from 375 to 300 of Effexor before, and the brain shocks and agitation are brutal. When Effexor works it's a lifesaver, and it's a good thing. (I think I'm answering another post in this parag)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-28399196729417128332007-07-14T23:23:00.000-05:002007-07-14T23:23:00.000-05:00I hope she gets well soon.I hope she gets well soon.therapydochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-81628624186517468202007-07-14T22:35:00.000-05:002007-07-14T22:35:00.000-05:00Oh. And if you'd like to read about my daughter, ...Oh. And if you'd like to read about my daughter, your input would be appreciated. <BR/><BR/>http://wtit.blogspot.com/2007/07/prayer-for-jules.htmlBud Weiser, WTIThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02333989186132063905noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-56468963535421772602007-07-14T22:29:00.000-05:002007-07-14T22:29:00.000-05:00Thanks for the clarification. I understand your p...Thanks for the clarification. I understand your point. And I am not anti-med. My 22 year old daughter has just re-entered a treatment center for eating disorders for the third time. We wish she would take her meds. <BR/><BR/>Anyway, thanks!Bud Weiser, WTIThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02333989186132063905noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-41438820635395443262007-07-14T21:17:00.000-05:002007-07-14T21:17:00.000-05:00Bud, if you had read more carefully (and I did fon...Bud, if you had read more carefully (and I did font in red) you would have noticed that I said, IF YOU'RE A PERSON WHO SEES RED AND CAN'T STOP YOURSELF. . .then maybe you should get a med eval. <BR/><BR/>Your intervention IS a rational cognitive intervention. <BR/><BR/>You talk to yourself and rationalize. . .Only if that person does something I've never done. . .Then I have the right to get angry.<BR/><BR/>That's a rational cognitive therapy, definitive.<BR/><BR/>Well done.therapydochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05088184676439578876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27072566.post-58757291951223983962007-07-14T15:28:00.000-05:002007-07-14T15:28:00.000-05:00With all due respect to your cabinet of drugs and ...With all due respect to your cabinet of drugs and your Harry Potter analogies, perhaps an approach be simpler. Example: I used to get road rage and yell like most drivers I know. About ten years ago it occured to me. "Only get angry at drivers who do something I have NEVER done." We all pull out at the wrong time or misjudge someones speed. I have not had a bad of driving since. I'd say twice in ten years I've seen smething I have never done, but, now I just laugh and think, "That's a new one".<BR/><BR/>Just a thought. I could be wrong, and I do have references.Bud Weiser, WTIThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02333989186132063905noreply@blogger.com