The Gift of Speech

Some people do seem more talented than others. They get more of a portion, so to speak.

And speaking of speech, I was thinking. . .

We probably got the gift just so people could sing.
Can't you hear the angels arguing about this?

Scene One:
The Old Mighty is deciding how he'll design the personalities of humankind. A couple of angels are trying to talk Him out of it:

The Old Mighty: I say they get to talk. I'll give them speech, even inflections.

Angel A: Big mistake. They'll just gossip and complain.

Angel B: And hurt one another's feelings!

The Old Mighty: Well, perhaps they can learn to not do that. This way they'll also be able to help one another. Humans will need a lot of help!

Angel A: Then let them point with their index fingers! They can gesticulate and flail their arms, jut out their chins. Don't let them talk!

Angel B: Well, maybe you should just teach them the alphabet and give them writing utensils. They can write whatever it is that they want to say. A is right. Whatever you do, Gee-Dee, don't let them talk.

Angel A: They'll never shut-up, once you get them started.

The Old Mighty: No, I disagree with both of you. From where I stand, they have to be able to praise Me. If they don't have someone to praise, then they'll think it's all about THEM!

Angel B: I know humans. They have no trouble whatsoever praising themselves. They're very narcissistic, too, meaning they get really mad when other people DON'T praise THEM. You'll be lucky if they praise You once a day.

Angel A: That's right. They could care less about talking to You.

The Old Mighty: I can make them talk to Me. You know there are no atheists in foxholes.

Angel B: But they'll curse you, too.

The Old Mighty: G-d forbid!

Angel A: And slander others on blogs!

Angel B: Anything's possible.

The Old Mighty: That would be bad. Yet. . .This gives them the opportunity to sell themselves and their good ideas. They can give speeches, politic. They can argue with me. I won't mind. I can handle it.

Angel A: But again, Old, they might lie. They might use that right to speech inappropriately.

Angel B: And some would lord themselves over others only because they CAN.

Angel A: And make promises they won't keep. You can do that with words!

Angel B: And once they invent television, the few will entertain the many. The privileged.

Angel A: And those who become true talking heads will bore the many.

Angel B: But that will help them sleep.

The Old Mighty: You make very good points.

Angel A: EXCELLENT points.

Angel B: Mine were really good.

Angel A: Look who's really good.

The Old Mighty: But think of it this way. They'll also be able to defend themselves when someone accuses them wrongly. That's important, speaking up.

Angel A: Yes, assertiveness. I read about it on TherapyDoc's blog.

The Old Mighty: And they can defend others, too, the poor, the defenseless, the down-trodden, others to whom I've bequested less than a portion of eloquence.

Angel B: Nicely put, Gee-Dee, but no one will want to become a public defender. They'll make much less.

The Old Mighty: But so what! I can reward them later!

Angel A: By the same token they might also use the gift of speech to fool one another, cheat and con one another, exploit one another.

The Old Mighty: Now that would be bad.

Angel B: You know humans can't control themselves. You've seen that movie, Defending Your Life. How do you expect them to control their mouths! They can't control ANYTHING.

The Old Mighty: Shsh! What if I give them the aptitude to sing?

Angel B: Now THAT would be a good coping strategy.

Angel A: What? Sing like us? They could never do it. Not well. It takes years of training and everyone thinks they're good. I can't imagine the noise.

The Old Mighty: It could get a little cacophonous, true.

Angel B: But some of them might sing so well, that it would be worth it.

Angel A: And people can pick and choose what they want to hear on YouTube anyway. As long as humans think they have an audience they're okay.

Angel B: And it's possible they'll think up some new tunes.

Angel A: True. They're a ditty lot according to the blueprint.

The Old Mighty: And I could give them accompaniment. A piano, for example. Conga drums. Maracas.

Angel B: Salsa! You could teach them salsa dancing!

The Old Mighty: That seals it. I have to see them dance. They get song, dance, AND the power of speech.

Angel A: I sure hope they use it wisely.

The Old Mighty: Me, too.

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