Monday, October 01, 2007
Stealing from the Closet
It was a little chilly in California, no surprise. It's always a little hotter or colder than I think it's going to be. But every time I pack, Empath Daught will tell me, Pack light. You can wear my clothes. Which I do.
We were going to spend some time outdoors so I said, "Honey, I could use a little jacket, or a sweater."
She got involved with the kids and I was thinking I'd have to hunt something down on my own, when she turned up with this white jacket. It's a little heavier than it looks.
She said, It looks great on you, Mom. See how it hits your shoulder? That's how it's supposed to fit. It's a little big on me. Keep it.
I felt a little funny about that.
"I took a jacket from you on my last visit, too. The jean jacket. You'll run out of jackets. And it's crazy. YOU should be stealing from MY closet, not the other way around."
Don't be silly, she said.
"But I feel bad about it."
Don't. I'll be happy knowing that when you put it on, you're thinking of me.
Which of course, got me in that place that everyone likes to be got. Does every time I think of it.
And I got to thinking that when they're little, it's about you creating them. You make them. First of all you put half of your DNA into them if they're biological. If they're adopted, you go through endless paper work, time and expense, interviews and "proofs" that you deserve to be a parent.
Then you spend the next 18 years dabbing finishing touches to personality, aptitudes, and spend thousands upon thousands of dollars for schools, medical expenses, food and shelter, and watch as they develop into selves.
And finally, you blink, and they're creating you. They're doing it with the help of their sisters and brothers-in-law, if you're zocheh, meaning merit it (Hebrew), and if you can handle it. I'm suggesting here that you do that, when it's your turn, that you handle it.
Some things, or should we say transitions, are surely are worth the trip.