Marital magic is a Big Subject.
Today, however, we're going to talk about taking the magic out of the relationship.
See, people think they can read minds. When they fail and things don't work out as they wished, they are confused (why didn't the system work?)and get angry or sad, or frustrated.
The quick and dirty is Don't Do It. Don't mind read. Check it out. Ask your partner what he/she is thinking, what he/she wants. Assume nothing. There's nothing very romantic at the end of the day about mind-reading.
Hearing your partner talk to you about thoughts and feelings? Now that's romantic.
It's the verbal communication that rocks.
I wrote more on this on When Therapists Blog. There's more to say, still, but this is a start.
Oh, and the Illusionist (the movie) really is magical. Maybe keep the magic where it belongs, as entertainment, not reality.
Copyright 2006, TherapyDoc
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
-
It's a very simple concept, really. But I remember first hearing about it many years ago in graduate school and getting it, but not get...
-
Okay, people. If you've been reading me thus far you probably get that the sort of thing I referred to in the last co-dependent post inf...
-
Maybe, instead of lovers, you start out as best friends. Or maybe there has always been chemistry. Maybe someone fixed the two up, though...
1 comment:
LOVED the move ,The Illusionist. I walked away with a new motivation to find the joy in simple things and make sure every day I'm doing something I really want.
Hugs,
Holly
Holly's Corner
Post a Comment