Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Strong, Confident, Sexy and Marie Claire

Just a comment on this. Marie Claire is a magazine, in case you didn't know, and the reference is actually to fashion, the way women and men in politics dress for work makes them strong, confident, and sexy.

The pols did look good in the magazine, but I had to check out quickly at the grocery store so I didn't have time to look really carefully.

This brings up the question of dressing for confidence. Honestly, I wish it worked, but am thinking, based upon nothing but a handful of very well-dressed clients who have very poor confidence, that it might not always, in fact, can backfire.

Spending thousands on a wardrobe that one cannot afford, thinking it buys confidence when it doesn't is a set-up for feeling even LESS confident (having thrown out all that green).

The quick and dirty on confidence is that it is something inside, and although you can fool people into thinking you're strong and confident, especially sexy, which is might work in business, it may not work for one personally or even socially.

Not that you should look like a slob or not care about appearance. Feeling you look good does make you feel good. All I'm saying is that there can be a disconnect between what is communicated to others and what we say to ourselves.

I think we listen to the voices in our own heads, predominently. There's more to say about confidence, but that's enough for now. Argue with your head when you feel you're inadequate, rather than your spouse for having spent too much on clothes.

Just a thought.

Copyright 2006, TherapyDoc

8 comments:

Jane said...

This is something I think about quite a bit because I have a job that allows me to dress very casually. On the other hand, I'm the president of my local chapter of an international community service organization. When I conduct club business, it feels more appropriate to dress at least a notch or two above my usual t-shirts and jeans. However, my nicer wardrobe is a little sparse these days and it seems wasteful to invest a lot of money on clothes I'll only wear a few times.

My confidence level is the same whether I'm wearing Converse high-tops or high heels.

Holly said...

This one struck a chord with me. I think that how we dress really does affect how we perform, but I've never thought about the extremes and people who take it as the "one step cure-all." That seems a dangerous leap to me too. I have found that the simple answer for me is when I feel least like putting on my make up is the day/time when I need it most! It's not about the clothes you wear, it's about the conversion of conquering the inner beast to feed laziness and "drab." Great post!

Hugs,
Holly
Holly's Corner

Holly said...

This one struck a chord with me. I think that how we dress really does affect how we perform, but I've never thought about the extremes and people who take it as the "one step cure-all." That seems a dangerous leap to me too. I have found that the simple answer for me is when I feel least like putting on my make up is the day/time when I need it most! It's not about the clothes you wear, it's about the conversion of conquering the inner beast to feed laziness and "drab." Great post!

Hugs,
Holly
Holly's Corner

Therapy Doc said...

Thanks! I love this conquer the inner lazy beast concept. So true, isn't it?

Therapy Doc said...

Jane, you're lucky you don't have to dress "UP" everyday.

I learned something cool from a patient, many years back, who only bought nicer looking things, and when they got a little drab, then they became her everyday wardrobe. Not a bad thought, I think.

eye said...

There is no need to "invest a lot of money" in order to look "a notch above". Between on-line bargains, discount stores, and "pre-worn" clothing boutiques, the investment is negligible. The real question is, do we buy into it -- the theory that looking better improves our and others performance. And until human evolution takes us to a future place where visual clues have no impact and our visual organs atrophy from lack of use, the answer is kind of a given.

Therapy Doc said...

So true, EYE, so true. And ya' gotta' love the visuals out there. They're so good for waking up the ol' brain.

Jenn said...

This is a great blog! I think that if you don't have confidence in your self, no matter how much money you spend on clothes, and no matter how good you actually do look in them....you wont feel like you look good in them.