If you can think of names of songs, movies, Youtube clips, anything that relates to sexual assault,harassment, or otherwise asserting sexual power with coercion in relationships (a form of sexual assault) would you let me know?
Thanks in advance,
therapydoc
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I can't think of anything specifically, but feministing.com does tons of stuff that might relate. You could try a search on their website.
It seems like every second song I hear on the radio would fit your criteria (sadly)
Looking forward to hearing what you have to say about this topic.
I assume you'll already be looking on google and youtube, so I searched my google reader account and facebook. The only thing I could find on google reader was a piece about coercion in church and state issues, I'll link to it anyway in case your interested, but I doubt it's relevant. http://atheistethicist.blogspot.com/2008/04/new-constitutional-test-for-religious.html
I found these two on facebook.
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=48814052171&ref=search&
sid=551558295.3322844437..1
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=68911230070&ref=search&sid=551558295.3322844437..1
i'm sure you already know this one but..Tori Amos Leather
also, there are a TON of books here: http://www.sexualassaultlibrary.org/
they are associated with www.pandys.org (a sexual assault survivors forum)
"Polly wants a cracker" by Nirvana is about a gang rape. it was meant to be a statement, but not a pro-rape statement.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jmj7Z-ZElFg
i am (was) a huge fan of Nirvana but could never listen to that song.
http://www.rainn.org/
Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network
Open Window Study Guide:
Are you looking for a film about sexual assault to discuss with your school, educational group, or family? Open Window, which debuted on Showtime, is a powerful film that inspires hope as it explores the effects of rape on survivors and their loved ones
go to "News Room" tab along the top and click on "Multimedia"
http://abyss2hope.blogspot.com/
abyss2hope: A rape survivor's zigzag journey into the open
Tuesday, Sept 15, 2009:
Carnival Against Sexual Violence 78Categories:
Legal
Media Watch
personal Stories
Raising Awareness
Research
Related site:
http://carnivalagainstsexualviolence.blogspot.com/
Has a great listing of other blogs which help raise awareness about sexual violence.
My name is Luka by Suzanne Vega
Why by Carly Simon
Pleasure and Pain by The Dyvinals
Beautiful by Cristina Aguilera
Stepping Stone by Duffy (?) - great song anyway
Stop by Sam Brown
nine inch nails "closer"..... primal combination of mingled sexual and violent impulses.....
Blondie's "Maria" is about a stalker......
Police "Every Breath You Take"..... sounds a little OCD
a lot of Annie Lennox's work carries the theme of overcoming abusive relationships..... "Would I Lie To You" and "No More I Love Yous"......
Hello, I enjoy your blog very much, so maybe this may help:
I go to a Christian university and we just had a speaker discuss sexual matters that arouse from sexual abuse.
you can get more info on syrogers.com (Sy Rogers is his name) He was a gay man and now is straight and he explains everything in great, and hysterical, detail.
Great speaker and worthy message.
Ani Difranco 'Gratitude'
Poe 'Control'
Tori Amos 'Me and a Gun'
Audrey was the victim of a physically abusive relationship with a sadistic dentist in "Little Shop of Horrors".... her hero/savior was the character Seymour...
speak, both a book and a movie-i don't know the author offhand
and of course, my blog :) but you have to do a lot of sifting to find the poetry these days...
Chain of Fools
Everyone helps the fool sometimes
Slave for you -britney spears
hit me with your best shot
Sober by pink
me and a friend used to argue over Closer--he though it was about a lonely guy missing his girlfriend-i flat out hated the song and thought it was about rape and assult--they weird thing is he wouldn't hurt a fly and he is a nurse to boot.
sometimes certain genders can find themselves in an abusive relationship with their entire culture..... Iron Jawed Angels
The English actress Emma Thompson did an advertising campaign (I think in the UK - sorry, I'm from Aus and only saw it once) about sexual abuse. She played the victim and I remember it was quite confronting but extremely effective.
"letter to a john" by ani difranco
"date rape" by sublime
Saffire, the Uppity Blues Women have a song called "1-800-799-7233" which is the number of the national hotline for battered women.
Also by Saffire: "You Don't Have to Take it"
"Hands Clean" by Alanis Morissette
You people are fantastic. Thanks SO much!
if you want a multicultural perspective, there is a particularly disturbing film called 'irreversible' that was quite controversial when it came out b/c it features a 10-minute long rape scene.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0290673/
on a side note, i've listened to nin's 'closer' for years and never once thought of it as a song about rape/assault. i always interpreted it as more of a recognition of the primal needs that sex can serve. interesting to hear other takes on it. (i'm female, fyi)
good luck to you.
Two movies that immediately come to mind are Kids and Body Shots. Plus there is always the show Law & Order: SVU. Another movie that comes to mind is 8MM. Or the General's Daughter.
There is also the Joyful Heart Foundation which is for rape survivors and supported by Mariska Hagirty.
Concrete Angel - Martina McBride - Deals with abuse in general, but it speaks to me of CSA. Vid on youtube, here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2lZsmrFT4g
www.isurvive.org
Man... Concrete Angel is such a great song/video.
Love L&O:SVU. Mariska is my hero.
Looks like you have some good answers here...FYI, I have an entire blog dedicated to the subject of rape and sexual assault:
http://rapesexualabuse.blogspot.com/
Currently showing to sell-out crowds at colleges all over the nation, the particularly degrading and controversial documentary I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell featuring the get-em-drunk-and-rape-em exploits of its college student/filmmaker. Also, every episode of Sopranos, Deadwood, the Bachelor/Bachelorette genre, Survivor, Boston Legal, and Law & Order: SUV. And the films Boxing Helena, The Color Purple, Thelma and Louise, Fried Green Tomatoes, What’s Love Got to Do With It, and Prom Night.
Interesting......
Linda
check out all of Andrea Gibson's work, specifically Blue Blanket. Her website: www.andreagibson.org or you can youtube it. She's GREAT.
Films...
The Color Purple
The Accused
Sleeping with the Enemy
Double Jeopardy
Enough
Where the Heart Is
I noticed that most of the songs are older ones so I thought I would add some newer ones.
Ray J - Sexy Can I
Usher - Love In This Club
50 Cent - Magic Stick
Here's some youtube videos
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtY_Wh-oUkM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAW9kgP6zFA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-WWTGrfjj4
You'll need to read the lyrics or listen to the music to decide if it's what's your looking for.
The movie that reverses the typical workplace harassment - Disclosure.
Stars Michael Douglas and Demi Moore.
How about the movie North Country with Charlize Theron?
I think that the movie Fatal Attraction pointed out the horrors of sexual obsession, stalking, and harassment. It still makes me cringe to this day.
"Beat Me Up" from Mary's Danish (a fairly obscure California band from the 90s). It's a fairly spot on expression of a woman telling her partner to stop abusing her.
I searched for it on YouTube (there's a clip with just the audio on there)
Great idea! Great list! The issue is largely whitewashed out of popular media since it makes American audiences uncomfortable.
Last season's (Oct 19) episode of Mad Men featured a chilling date rape scene between the very likeable "Joan" character and her fiancee Greg (an MD). He rapes her in an office, she protests but can do nothing.
Previously mentioned, the film What's Love Got to Do With It, which is mostly about domestic violence, also has a pretty harrowing rape scene (Ike attacks Tina in a sound booth... she hobbles away).
"Gone With the Wind" has a marital rape scene between Rhett and Scarlett, although that is arguably a bit more complex (she comes down the stairs singing the next day).
Song-wise, "Hurts So Good" by John Mellencamp touches on the question of why people stay in these relationships.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqyLRpGgxRs
This may be too highfalutin, but "Othello" seems to follow the domestic violence paradigm to a T. Desdemona marries Othello after a whirlwind romance, they move far away (so she's isolated from her social network), groundless accusations of unfaithfulness, and even when the truth is revealed Othello partially lets himself off the hook as he "loved not wisely but too well." That's "Honey I don't want to hurt you, but you just make me so angry! I wouldn't get so angry if I didn't love you so much" just in more poetic language.
There was a case Ellison v. Brady that dealt with sexual harassment. It was made for TV movie: Hostile Advances for Lifetime.
a made-for-tv movie about Tracey Thurmond from Torrington, CT
tapes of the Anita Hill hearings
stone temple pilots
sex type thing
There was also I think a scene of marital rape in the movie The Duchess. From what I recall, the husband used rape to assert his power over the Duchess when he feels their marriage is threatened by her lover... Kind of a "Remember you belong to me" statement.
Are you looking for fiction books at all? I've come across a lot, some that focus on the assault, and others that just mention it.
These strongly feature assault:
Speak, by Laurie Halse Anderson
Safe, by Susan Shaw
Story of a Girl, by Sara Zarr
Just Listen, by Sarah Dessen
Dreamland, by Sarah Dessen
Bastard Out of Carolina, by Dorothy Allison
I'll comment again if I think of more.
matha mcbride and her famous abuse song indepentance day --the video itself show cover the topic
smack my ***** out by prodigy in Cahrlie angels
that one S and M main stream move movie about the sectaury who has fetch the letter for her bozz in her month and she is crawling around on the floor,
Thank you, thank you, thank you, once again.
A teenage client of mine told me that "The Hills Have Eyes" horror film series has rape scenes in both movies (in addition to blood and gore). I wouldn't waste the oxygen and brain cells watching such a thing, so I don't know if it helps. I think its clear to see based on what's been posted so far that depictions of sexual assault are pervasive in the entertainment industry.
Anything but that by the Watchmen. A perfect song for what you asked for.
Here is a link to the lyrics.
http://www.metrolyrics.com/anything-but-that-lyrics-watchmen.html
this is mildly entertaining if it wasn't so tragically sad:
A simple resolution to recognize October as Domestic Violence Awareness Month by the Pennsylvania House of Representatives was halted by Rep. Daryl Metcalfe, a Republican representing Butler (County). Why? Because, he said, "It has a homosexual agenda."
No, I'm not making this up. Here is the rest of the quote from his remarks on the House floor, objecting to the resolution: "I protest, this is not non-controversial, and if you read the language it has a homosexual agenda."
On the same day, also on the House floor, he made matters worse. The House was about to vote on increasing marriage license fees from $3 to $28, with the increased amount going to a fund for victims of domestic abuse. Metcalfe opposed the measure, calling the funding of domestic violence programs "a slap in the face to family values."
The bill passed despite his outrageous claim.
link
There's a rape scene in "Mad Men" in the second season. The episode is "The Mountain King". Joan Holloway is raped by her fiance in her office. My take on it was that he was extremely threatened by her career and what he probably thought were overly amorous men (he was right!), and used that as a horrible excuse to exert power over her.
http://www.nj.com/entertainment/tv/index.ssf/2008/10/mad_men_the_mountain_king_merg.html
Would pretty women work? vivian seemed to be the type to exert sexual power in a relationship.
not related to your blog post, can I email you for a therapy doctor referral? I can't find your email on your blog. thanks!
Heading out, so no time to read all of these posts, but I saw the one on Othello, and I second that one. (I would - I am A.B.D. with a specialization in the English Renaissance). At the end, Desdemona takes on the blame for the abuse so that when she is asked who has killed her, she says "Nobody; I myself." It's very powerful.
Other than that, several years back, I watched a decent film with Charlize Theron about sexual harassment in the workplace called North Country. My computer is not pasting the website address, but google it; I think it's a quality film.
J.P.
So long as we have hit on Shakespeare, Titus Andronicus or the film version Titus with Anthony Hopkins...though the violence is horrific. Was his first play, I think.
The Accused ...starring Jodi Foster
Oh yes, I love the Anthony Hopkins version of Titus. Because Titus is so violent, some have argued that Shakespeare could not have written it. The rape of the main female character Lavinia is based on a classical story in Ovid. One terribly shocking part of Titus that also takes place in classical stories about rape is the father's (or another man's) killing of the daughter due to his shame over her being raped (so patriarchal). Rape narratives have a long history in Western literature.
Oh, I forgot to add Agnieszka Holland's film 'Angry Harvest'. Against the backdrop of the Holocaust, it explores the imbalance of power between a Catholic farmer and the Jewish woman he "shelters" from the Nazis. This is one of those artsy-fartsy films - of the sort that make the rounds of smaller independent theaters. But if you are building a library of DVDs with imbedded themes of sexual power/exploitation/manipulation, this one is rife with examples that are, unfortunately, as relevant today as seventy years ago. Sad face.
This is going to take me awhile to read, listen, see. Thanks so much to all of you, again and again.
The Dark I Know Well from the musical Spring Awakening. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ON2I21zJa40
Its about sexual abuse/incest.
Wow, am I ever late to the party.
Amy Grant has a song called "Ask Me" specifically about sexual abuse which asks the question, "Where was God in all of this mess?"
"Only Women Bleed" by Alice Cooper
Someone already mentioned it, but I want to mention it again because it's SO amazing.
"Gratitude," by Ani Difranco. It makes me cry every time.
Also, "Me and a Gun" by Tori Amos.
The Police "Don't Stand So Close to Me" - kind of set the tone for the 80's culture in which a teacher tells me I'm so hot, kisses me...I actually played this for my T last session, remind him of what it was like then...
Van Halen "Hot for Teacher" - but it's OK if you are a boy and the teacher is female?
Later, it was "Teacher" by George Michael.
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, Maya Angelou (child sexual abuse) - it's a short memoir, beautiful book.
The teacher thing is NEVER okay. And I hardly ever use never. The hierarchy, the power, translates to coercion.
if it hasn't already been suggested (too many comments to read through) "better man" by pearl jam.
here is a vid:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lUj9zWwop8
the movie - "The Accused" - with Jodi Foster
Plumb- Damaged
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQBbxt6mfXg
Also does another song called Cut that is relevent. She's talked pretty openly about her past that caused her to write these songs.
there's the classic and at the time rather controversial Simpson's babysitter episode:
http://tinyurl.com/kj8p7g
Also, can't forget Southpark's Sexual Harassment Panda: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_yrBLepHiQ
And the brilliant movie, The Witches of Eastwick. I can't think of any much more on target than that one.
Also the first Legally Blonde movie deals with sexual harassment/coercion/power quite well (strange as it may sound).
Where is my head?! Can't believe I forgot to mention Bastard Out of Carolina. Jenna Elfman really should have gotten an academy award for this performance. It's gut wrenching but it deals with it all powerfully well and accurately. V. much not something I'd recommend to you had you not asked, Doc. It's intensely confronting, the layered subtext of violence, confrontation and betrayal is breathtaking. Often very literally.
Boys Don't Cry
Sfordinarygirl, it's therapydocatgmaildotcom
Janie's got a Gun, by Aerosmith.
Also just about anything by the Mamas and the Papas
unfornaturely the mamas and papas have in the news for years of abuse and incest of their daugther --also no one mention pearl jame defineing abuse song Jeremy !
Many movies by Pedro Almodovar - Mala Educacion and Volver to name a few.
I'm a little late on this, but am surprised no one mentioned the films Lolita (either version, but the 1997 release was especially disturbing to me) or American Beauty.
Notes On A Scandal is another good one of the teacher-student variety.
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