Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Humble Request

If you can think of names of songs, movies, Youtube clips, anything that relates to sexual assault,harassment, or otherwise asserting sexual power with coercion in relationships (a form of sexual assault) would you let me know?

Thanks in advance,

therapydoc

81 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't think of anything specifically, but feministing.com does tons of stuff that might relate. You could try a search on their website.
It seems like every second song I hear on the radio would fit your criteria (sadly)
Looking forward to hearing what you have to say about this topic.

themadandwild said...

I assume you'll already be looking on google and youtube, so I searched my google reader account and facebook. The only thing I could find on google reader was a piece about coercion in church and state issues, I'll link to it anyway in case your interested, but I doubt it's relevant. http://atheistethicist.blogspot.com/2008/04/new-constitutional-test-for-religious.html

I found these two on facebook.
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=48814052171&ref=search&
sid=551558295.3322844437..1
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=68911230070&ref=search&sid=551558295.3322844437..1

Lynda said...

i'm sure you already know this one but..Tori Amos Leather

Lynda said...

also, there are a TON of books here: http://www.sexualassaultlibrary.org/
they are associated with www.pandys.org (a sexual assault survivors forum)

therapydoc said...

Thanks!

lynette said...

"Polly wants a cracker" by Nirvana is about a gang rape. it was meant to be a statement, but not a pro-rape statement.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jmj7Z-ZElFg

i am (was) a huge fan of Nirvana but could never listen to that song.

Wendy said...

http://www.rainn.org/

Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network

Open Window Study Guide:
Are you looking for a film about sexual assault to discuss with your school, educational group, or family? Open Window, which debuted on Showtime, is a powerful film that inspires hope as it explores the effects of rape on survivors and their loved ones


go to "News Room" tab along the top and click on "Multimedia"

Wendy said...

http://abyss2hope.blogspot.com/

abyss2hope: A rape survivor's zigzag journey into the open

Tuesday, Sept 15, 2009:

Carnival Against Sexual Violence 78Categories:
Legal
Media Watch
personal Stories
Raising Awareness
Research
Related site:
http://carnivalagainstsexualviolence.blogspot.com/

Has a great listing of other blogs which help raise awareness about sexual violence.

Devorah said...

My name is Luka by Suzanne Vega
Why by Carly Simon
Pleasure and Pain by The Dyvinals
Beautiful by Cristina Aguilera
Stepping Stone by Duffy (?) - great song anyway
Stop by Sam Brown

Ghost Dansing said...

nine inch nails "closer"..... primal combination of mingled sexual and violent impulses.....

Ghost Dansing said...

Blondie's "Maria" is about a stalker......

Ghost Dansing said...

Police "Every Breath You Take"..... sounds a little OCD

Ghost Dansing said...

a lot of Annie Lennox's work carries the theme of overcoming abusive relationships..... "Would I Lie To You" and "No More I Love Yous"......

JayFay said...

Hello, I enjoy your blog very much, so maybe this may help:

I go to a Christian university and we just had a speaker discuss sexual matters that arouse from sexual abuse.
you can get more info on syrogers.com (Sy Rogers is his name) He was a gay man and now is straight and he explains everything in great, and hysterical, detail.
Great speaker and worthy message.

linrob63 said...

Ani Difranco 'Gratitude'

Poe 'Control'

Tori Amos 'Me and a Gun'

Ghost Dansing said...

Audrey was the victim of a physically abusive relationship with a sadistic dentist in "Little Shop of Horrors".... her hero/savior was the character Seymour...

little sheep said...

speak, both a book and a movie-i don't know the author offhand

and of course, my blog :) but you have to do a lot of sifting to find the poetry these days...

Anonymous said...

Chain of Fools

Everyone helps the fool sometimes

Slave for you -britney spears

hit me with your best shot

Sober by pink

Anonymous said...

me and a friend used to argue over Closer--he though it was about a lonely guy missing his girlfriend-i flat out hated the song and thought it was about rape and assult--they weird thing is he wouldn't hurt a fly and he is a nurse to boot.

Ghost Dansing said...

sometimes certain genders can find themselves in an abusive relationship with their entire culture..... Iron Jawed Angels

Anonymous said...

The English actress Emma Thompson did an advertising campaign (I think in the UK - sorry, I'm from Aus and only saw it once) about sexual abuse. She played the victim and I remember it was quite confronting but extremely effective.

Anonymous said...

"letter to a john" by ani difranco

"date rape" by sublime

Anonymous said...

Saffire, the Uppity Blues Women have a song called "1-800-799-7233" which is the number of the national hotline for battered women.
Also by Saffire: "You Don't Have to Take it"

Anonymous said...

"Hands Clean" by Alanis Morissette

therapydoc said...

You people are fantastic. Thanks SO much!

akilduff said...

if you want a multicultural perspective, there is a particularly disturbing film called 'irreversible' that was quite controversial when it came out b/c it features a 10-minute long rape scene.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0290673/


on a side note, i've listened to nin's 'closer' for years and never once thought of it as a song about rape/assault. i always interpreted it as more of a recognition of the primal needs that sex can serve. interesting to hear other takes on it. (i'm female, fyi)

good luck to you.

Fallen said...

Two movies that immediately come to mind are Kids and Body Shots. Plus there is always the show Law & Order: SVU. Another movie that comes to mind is 8MM. Or the General's Daughter.


There is also the Joyful Heart Foundation which is for rape survivors and supported by Mariska Hagirty.

porcini66 said...

Concrete Angel - Martina McBride - Deals with abuse in general, but it speaks to me of CSA. Vid on youtube, here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2lZsmrFT4g

Anonymous said...

www.isurvive.org

Lisa Marie said...

Man... Concrete Angel is such a great song/video.

Love L&O:SVU. Mariska is my hero.

Barbara(aka Layla) said...

Looks like you have some good answers here...FYI, I have an entire blog dedicated to the subject of rape and sexual assault:

http://rapesexualabuse.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

Currently showing to sell-out crowds at colleges all over the nation, the particularly degrading and controversial documentary I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell featuring the get-em-drunk-and-rape-em exploits of its college student/filmmaker. Also, every episode of Sopranos, Deadwood, the Bachelor/Bachelorette genre, Survivor, Boston Legal, and Law & Order: SUV. And the films Boxing Helena, The Color Purple, Thelma and Louise, Fried Green Tomatoes, What’s Love Got to Do With It, and Prom Night.

Linda S. Socha said...

Interesting......
Linda

Emily said...

check out all of Andrea Gibson's work, specifically Blue Blanket. Her website: www.andreagibson.org or you can youtube it. She's GREAT.

Isle Dance said...

Films...

The Color Purple
The Accused
Sleeping with the Enemy
Double Jeopardy
Enough
Where the Heart Is

Jennifer said...

I noticed that most of the songs are older ones so I thought I would add some newer ones.

Ray J - Sexy Can I
Usher - Love In This Club
50 Cent - Magic Stick

Here's some youtube videos

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtY_Wh-oUkM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAW9kgP6zFA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-WWTGrfjj4

You'll need to read the lyrics or listen to the music to decide if it's what's your looking for.

Seren Dippity said...

The movie that reverses the typical workplace harassment - Disclosure.

Stars Michael Douglas and Demi Moore.

Tuesday@11 said...

How about the movie North Country with Charlize Theron?

Syd said...

I think that the movie Fatal Attraction pointed out the horrors of sexual obsession, stalking, and harassment. It still makes me cringe to this day.

Amy said...

"Beat Me Up" from Mary's Danish (a fairly obscure California band from the 90s). It's a fairly spot on expression of a woman telling her partner to stop abusing her.

I searched for it on YouTube (there's a clip with just the audio on there)

Samurai Scientist said...

Great idea! Great list! The issue is largely whitewashed out of popular media since it makes American audiences uncomfortable.

Last season's (Oct 19) episode of Mad Men featured a chilling date rape scene between the very likeable "Joan" character and her fiancee Greg (an MD). He rapes her in an office, she protests but can do nothing.

Previously mentioned, the film What's Love Got to Do With It, which is mostly about domestic violence, also has a pretty harrowing rape scene (Ike attacks Tina in a sound booth... she hobbles away).

"Gone With the Wind" has a marital rape scene between Rhett and Scarlett, although that is arguably a bit more complex (she comes down the stairs singing the next day).

Song-wise, "Hurts So Good" by John Mellencamp touches on the question of why people stay in these relationships.

Jeni said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqyLRpGgxRs

Anonymous said...

This may be too highfalutin, but "Othello" seems to follow the domestic violence paradigm to a T. Desdemona marries Othello after a whirlwind romance, they move far away (so she's isolated from her social network), groundless accusations of unfaithfulness, and even when the truth is revealed Othello partially lets himself off the hook as he "loved not wisely but too well." That's "Honey I don't want to hurt you, but you just make me so angry! I wouldn't get so angry if I didn't love you so much" just in more poetic language.

Dawn W said...

There was a case Ellison v. Brady that dealt with sexual harassment. It was made for TV movie: Hostile Advances for Lifetime.

GG said...

a made-for-tv movie about Tracey Thurmond from Torrington, CT

tapes of the Anita Hill hearings

Pips said...

stone temple pilots
sex type thing

Anonymous said...

There was also I think a scene of marital rape in the movie The Duchess. From what I recall, the husband used rape to assert his power over the Duchess when he feels their marriage is threatened by her lover... Kind of a "Remember you belong to me" statement.

Sayrina said...

Are you looking for fiction books at all? I've come across a lot, some that focus on the assault, and others that just mention it.

These strongly feature assault:
Speak, by Laurie Halse Anderson
Safe, by Susan Shaw
Story of a Girl, by Sara Zarr
Just Listen, by Sarah Dessen
Dreamland, by Sarah Dessen
Bastard Out of Carolina, by Dorothy Allison


I'll comment again if I think of more.

Anonymous said...

matha mcbride and her famous abuse song indepentance day --the video itself show cover the topic

Anonymous said...

smack my ***** out by prodigy in Cahrlie angels

Anonymous said...

that one S and M main stream move movie about the sectaury who has fetch the letter for her bozz in her month and she is crawling around on the floor,

therapydoc said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you, once again.

Jim Valeri, LMHC said...

A teenage client of mine told me that "The Hills Have Eyes" horror film series has rape scenes in both movies (in addition to blood and gore). I wouldn't waste the oxygen and brain cells watching such a thing, so I don't know if it helps. I think its clear to see based on what's been posted so far that depictions of sexual assault are pervasive in the entertainment industry.

West Street said...

Anything but that by the Watchmen. A perfect song for what you asked for.
Here is a link to the lyrics.
http://www.metrolyrics.com/anything-but-that-lyrics-watchmen.html

Ghost Dansing said...

this is mildly entertaining if it wasn't so tragically sad:

A simple resolution to recognize October as Domestic Violence Awareness Month by the Pennsylvania House of Representatives was halted by Rep. Daryl Metcalfe, a Republican representing Butler (County). Why? Because, he said, "It has a homosexual agenda."

No, I'm not making this up. Here is the rest of the quote from his remarks on the House floor, objecting to the resolution: "I protest, this is not non-controversial, and if you read the language it has a homosexual agenda."

On the same day, also on the House floor, he made matters worse. The House was about to vote on increasing marriage license fees from $3 to $28, with the increased amount going to a fund for victims of domestic abuse. Metcalfe opposed the measure, calling the funding of domestic violence programs "a slap in the face to family values."

The bill passed despite his outrageous claim.

link

nashbabe said...

There's a rape scene in "Mad Men" in the second season. The episode is "The Mountain King". Joan Holloway is raped by her fiance in her office. My take on it was that he was extremely threatened by her career and what he probably thought were overly amorous men (he was right!), and used that as a horrible excuse to exert power over her.

http://www.nj.com/entertainment/tv/index.ssf/2008/10/mad_men_the_mountain_king_merg.html

sfordinarygirl said...

Would pretty women work? vivian seemed to be the type to exert sexual power in a relationship.

not related to your blog post, can I email you for a therapy doctor referral? I can't find your email on your blog. thanks!

Anonymous said...

Heading out, so no time to read all of these posts, but I saw the one on Othello, and I second that one. (I would - I am A.B.D. with a specialization in the English Renaissance). At the end, Desdemona takes on the blame for the abuse so that when she is asked who has killed her, she says "Nobody; I myself." It's very powerful.

Other than that, several years back, I watched a decent film with Charlize Theron about sexual harassment in the workplace called North Country. My computer is not pasting the website address, but google it; I think it's a quality film.

J.P.

linrob63 said...

So long as we have hit on Shakespeare, Titus Andronicus or the film version Titus with Anthony Hopkins...though the violence is horrific. Was his first play, I think.

Dreaming again said...

The Accused ...starring Jodi Foster

Anonymous said...

Oh yes, I love the Anthony Hopkins version of Titus. Because Titus is so violent, some have argued that Shakespeare could not have written it. The rape of the main female character Lavinia is based on a classical story in Ovid. One terribly shocking part of Titus that also takes place in classical stories about rape is the father's (or another man's) killing of the daughter due to his shame over her being raped (so patriarchal). Rape narratives have a long history in Western literature.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I forgot to add Agnieszka Holland's film 'Angry Harvest'. Against the backdrop of the Holocaust, it explores the imbalance of power between a Catholic farmer and the Jewish woman he "shelters" from the Nazis. This is one of those artsy-fartsy films - of the sort that make the rounds of smaller independent theaters. But if you are building a library of DVDs with imbedded themes of sexual power/exploitation/manipulation, this one is rife with examples that are, unfortunately, as relevant today as seventy years ago. Sad face.

therapydoc said...

This is going to take me awhile to read, listen, see. Thanks so much to all of you, again and again.

Amy Rose said...

The Dark I Know Well from the musical Spring Awakening. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ON2I21zJa40

Its about sexual abuse/incest.

cardiogirl said...

Wow, am I ever late to the party.

Amy Grant has a song called "Ask Me" specifically about sexual abuse which asks the question, "Where was God in all of this mess?"

Anonymous said...

"Only Women Bleed" by Alice Cooper

sayhealth said...

Someone already mentioned it, but I want to mention it again because it's SO amazing.

"Gratitude," by Ani Difranco. It makes me cry every time.

Also, "Me and a Gun" by Tori Amos.

Ella said...

The Police "Don't Stand So Close to Me" - kind of set the tone for the 80's culture in which a teacher tells me I'm so hot, kisses me...I actually played this for my T last session, remind him of what it was like then...

Van Halen "Hot for Teacher" - but it's OK if you are a boy and the teacher is female?

Later, it was "Teacher" by George Michael.

Ellen said...

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, Maya Angelou (child sexual abuse) - it's a short memoir, beautiful book.

therapydoc said...

The teacher thing is NEVER okay. And I hardly ever use never. The hierarchy, the power, translates to coercion.

one4theroad said...

if it hasn't already been suggested (too many comments to read through) "better man" by pearl jam.
here is a vid:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lUj9zWwop8

Annie said...

the movie - "The Accused" - with Jodi Foster

Valcoris said...

Plumb- Damaged

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQBbxt6mfXg

Also does another song called Cut that is relevent. She's talked pretty openly about her past that caused her to write these songs.

catatonickid said...

there's the classic and at the time rather controversial Simpson's babysitter episode:

http://tinyurl.com/kj8p7g

Also, can't forget Southpark's Sexual Harassment Panda: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_yrBLepHiQ

And the brilliant movie, The Witches of Eastwick. I can't think of any much more on target than that one.

Also the first Legally Blonde movie deals with sexual harassment/coercion/power quite well (strange as it may sound).

catatonickid said...

Where is my head?! Can't believe I forgot to mention Bastard Out of Carolina. Jenna Elfman really should have gotten an academy award for this performance. It's gut wrenching but it deals with it all powerfully well and accurately. V. much not something I'd recommend to you had you not asked, Doc. It's intensely confronting, the layered subtext of violence, confrontation and betrayal is breathtaking. Often very literally.

Anonymous said...

Boys Don't Cry

therapydoc said...

Sfordinarygirl, it's therapydocatgmaildotcom

Ronald said...

Janie's got a Gun, by Aerosmith.

Also just about anything by the Mamas and the Papas

Anonymous said...

unfornaturely the mamas and papas have in the news for years of abuse and incest of their daugther --also no one mention pearl jame defineing abuse song Jeremy !

Anonymous said...

Many movies by Pedro Almodovar - Mala Educacion and Volver to name a few.

The Daily B said...

I'm a little late on this, but am surprised no one mentioned the films Lolita (either version, but the 1997 release was especially disturbing to me) or American Beauty.

Notes On A Scandal is another good one of the teacher-student variety.