National Association of Computer Guys

You know your guy is one of them if:

You can't get ahold of him

He can always get you the same thing you just got online for 20% less

He has at least one other full time job

He just can't possibly explain what he's just done to get your computer working again; he's not even sure himself

It's always the fan

He's probably going to replace the fan

He says to you, "Where did you get THIS router?"

He tells you that AOL really will take over your computer and he's right. Skype, too. Norton, for sure. Get rid of all of it.

He always has an extra router/cable/modem/harddrive enclosure that you can borrow because he really doesn't need his.

Only HE knows the name of your computer

He's the only one who knows where your network key is saved

He's the only one who can restore anything if your computer has really crashed, including your network key.

He knows enough not to coach you through the motions over the phone.

Next to your significant other, your mom, your therapist, and your primary care physician, he's one of the most important people in your life.

He won't charge, but will accept money

He knows how much you need him but doesn't rub it in

He won't eat, but might take a cookie for the road

Both of you pray that one day he'll be able to send someone else out to fix your computer, but deep down you really enjoy your time together. So you dread that day.

He's always saying to someone on the phone, Soon. I'm almost done.

He'll be in your neighborhood next Thursday.



Your guy sounds awesome. I need a computer guy like that. I don't what I'm doing half the time when I decide to install some software or whatever. Actually, I don't know what I'm doing ANY of the time.

And one day I'll learn to start backing things up more often! I just had a hard disk crash and lost a bunch of stuff there was no excuse for losing. Arrrggh.
Mariposa said…
Hahaha, I can so relate to you!
Aaron said…
I AM that guy!! I have a day job (where the system always is at fault). I have a box full of spare parts that might eventually be useful. I blame memory issues, not the fan. I may not have all the answers but I never fear anything enough not to try!
therapydoc said…
Aaron, you will always be a popular guy, no question. I wrote it for you, of course (well, someone like you).
So they are all like that! I just thought only my circle of computer guy friends are all like that.
Barbara K. said…
My husband is my computer guy, and I swear, all he has to do is walk into my office and the computer that had frozen solid and had eaten hours of my work would unfreeze, wink at him, and chug along as if it had never tortured me with the blue-screen-of-death.
chana said…
It's Nick Burns!
therapydoc said…
This just in!

My computer guy emails me and writes:
I found everything you wrote to be completely
accurate. But you left off one item:

"Even though he tells you three times not to try to
reach him at THAT email address you can never quite
remember how or when you're supposed to contact him,
so you write to that same email address from 10 years
ago that he never checks and pray that he sees your

Well I didn't. Not until today.