The 4th Carnival of All Substances-Therefore, Choose. . .

WHAT? You come here for booze, meth and coke and I offer you cheese, figs, spices, grapes, almonds a pomegranate, olive oil (that's an ancient olive press, perhaps used 2008 years ago), carob seeds, baklava and a peach?

Maybe you can make a substance out of something. Frankly, they're better for you, taste better, will get you high if you consume in the right frame of mind (mainly if you're hungry), and have fewer calories, except for maybe the baklava and the cheese.

But when was the last time you had cheese like that, and when has anyone had baklava, seriously?

Those who burtz (yiddish, rhymes with tour, add the "tz", means complain) about sugar addictions haven't submitted anything so I can totally get away with all of this!

You've heard "Therefore choose life?" We say, Therefore, choose . . .

Okay here we go.

Erin, who beat an Oxycontin addiction tells us about differences in motivation (like why be dirty when you can be clean) over at What Winners Do.
Thanks, Erin.

Two Dogs Barking reminds us what a drag co-dependency can be. She tells us how it's pretty hard not to be angry when an S-O who had been using through-out the relationship finally gets sober, except she's already booted him and now he's with someone else. Two wanted to break dishes but got a grip (yay).

Fact is, it's pretty hard to express anger safely. The sixties are over, basically, but I'd like to get my hands on those styro-foam bats, if anyone still has them.

And Jimson Lee, over at Speed and Endurance informs us that real athletes know how alcohol messes with your body. His personal fave drink is Gatorade mixed with H20. I'll have to try that. (Isn't Gatorade loaded with caffeine?)

Another fitness buff, RT, tells us who to call if someone we love is using. Ghostbusters, it's not.

Meanwhile, the Registered Addiction Counselors at Bright Eye-Online Alcoholism and Addiction Counseling give you a nice rational, cognitive therapy approach to coping with cravings for drugs and alcohol (picture your S-O saying Bye, Bye, been nice to know ya'). They also present a cognitive tx spin on relapse prevention. This is EXACTLY the stuff I taught at Univ of Illinois. You'll love it (if you like this sort of thing).

Charles H Green, Trusted Advisor generally writes about business, but is kind enough to lend us a philosophical spin on recovery. Booze, drugs, money, there are parallels to finance, obviously. Charles has a really nice post about apologizing that probably is more connected to us, check that one out, too.

Addiction Recover Blog reminds us of 15 signs of trouble, as if we need to be reminded(we do, we do!).

Tracee Sioux at So Sioux Me, Complaint Free House kvetches about her kid's kvetching and then tells us that she thinks she's also addicted to complaining. She writes, Could complaining be considered a substance if the idea of giving it up as a coping mechanism makes me feel as if I'm in recovery? Sorry dear, you're reaching.

But Scott, equally off the track, presents the characters from Harry Potter as real people you meet on campus, in College and Finance, the first humor blog I've seen about money.

Let's finish up with a couple of late submissions that I haven't read but you probably should (or could, or would, far be it from me to tell you what to do):


You get the professional take on co-dependency, Nancy at Emotional Well-being tells you where that's at. I trust Nancy.

Andy at Money Walks (is this an addiction, spending? I suppose it is, fine). Has something to say about paying off those cards. Just do it, maybe, I had to shop so I didn't have time to read it, but you should.

John, at the Universe of Success is serious when he tells you how to stop drinking.

And finally, Bill, at the Universe of Success (would I lie) asks if we're all nuts.

Very nice. My daughter-in-law's mother once sent me a nut-cracker shaped like a squirrel. Not a small item, takes up a lot of room on the table, and it's grown on me. But I have to tell you, I don't take that kind of talk lightly, don't appreciate words like "nuts" or "crazy" to describe people who have the guts to talk about issues in therapy.

Just an FYO.

THE BAR IS CLOSED. YOU CAN ALL GO HOME NOW. PEACE AND LOVE AND HAVE A SOBER WEEKEND. That goes with slow down when you drive, you'll live longer.

therapydoc

The first Carnival of Alcohol and Relationships

The first (that I know of) CARNIVAL OF ALCOHOL AND RELATIONSHIPS IS A DRUG AND ALCOHOL FREE ZONE.

We'll go with the natural high, expanding the brain with good communication.
Crazy, I know, I know.

Funny that we should celebrate this first carnival on the eve of the eve of the Passover holiday. Passover is the quintessential celebration of freedom (from Egyptian slavery, 1500 B.C.E. , after 210 years of slavery, if you paid attention in Sunday school)

So here's another equation:

RECOVERY FROM SUBSTANCE DEPENDENCY/ABUSE = FREEDOM, too.

Many of the contributors to this carnival would agree.

May 13, 2007 will be the first CARNIVAL OF ALL SUBSTANCES, and any of you can post a story about your experiences, thoughts, relationships, with a person, drug, favorite person, favorite drug, favorite drug of a favorite person, whatever you like.

This and future carnivals should serve deterrents, not cocktails.

If your mother hasn't told you already, Drugs are Bad.

Without further ado,

Nael, at Another Door Opens writes a beautiful post about friendship He makes it clear that well-intentioned friends don't necessarily understand that owning responsibility for the past is key.

Relentless writes about being Daddy's little girl and suffering the wrath of her mother in an anniversary post

MEG, at You and Me and Floating on a Tidal Wave, writes a very sad story about her daughter's relationship with her uncle, and how three lives were interrupted and changed forever due to alcoholism. A must read, Uncle Randy.

Then she follows it up with a post on her father, and then another on mom. Thank you so much, Meg. These are beautiful posts and we can all learn from them. I certainly did.

Syd at I'm Just Fine is an adult child of an alcoholic married to an alcoholic who writes about his life. He goes to Al-Anon and writes a beautiful post he calls The Alcoholic Love Relationship: I've heard it said over and over that co-dependents, especially those who had alcoholic parents, are attracted to alcoholics. . . I realize that I've spent a long time making others happy and what I now want to do is make myself happy. You're going to like the new glasses, Syd.

In a second post on self-worth, having been criticized harshly by his father, he writes: We hid our feeling of self-worth deep within, and our perspective became distorted. Many of us even tried to conceal that we felt worthless on the inside to the point that we couldn't show any real warmth and concern for anyone, including ourselves. Then: if someone really doesn't like the way I am, then there needs to be communication that is clear and a discussion that is rational and loving

You never have those conversations, by the way, when someone is impaired.

Pat Santy,or Dr. Sanity, our resident psychiatrist posts the best description of enabling I've ever seen. She doesn't mind stretching the metaphor to terrorism, either. Check it out.

Brave Giant Mark, at DrinkandDrugNoMore has something to say to teens who have to make a choice: What if you like it? Then what?

J.D. at VicariousRising wrote a heartbreaker about how people really do kick the dog, includes a great clip from the movie, Fame.

Noor, Malaysia's First Recovery Blogger, writes about his heroic recovery from heroin in prison tired of smoking drugs, I preferred to stay in prison.

Jen, at StayAtHomeMotherdom tried to adopt and was outed as an alcoholic to the agency. This was the first major issue in my life that I learned to relinquish and accept. I learned gradually overtime that I didn't need to retaliate. Read her story.

LushGirl at A Day in the Life of YoMamma in Whine and Song, Why Now writes about the challenge of working a program AND raising a troubled teenager. She's blaming herself, but seems to this doc, is doing the best she can.

Little Miss Mel on the same theme, blogs about confusing someone who is "difficult" with someone who is a difficult alcoholic".

Kevin, at the Creative Power of Thought, on the Laws of Attraction, thinks that it is a person's negative thinking that brings on negative outcomes in life, and doesn't buy the victim-hood rationale for drinking: There are far more constructive forms of coping with life challenges than alcohol poisoning. Oh yes, Kevin

Dr. Hal, a life coach at NorthStar Mental Fitness says in his post that "The first step to learning how to take care of yourself is to admit that you don't want to take care of yourself and you want adult pacifiers to take care of you." Wow. He'll beat the denial out of you! As he should, as he should.

Paul E. Coughlin presents Alcohol useage posted at Paul E. Coughlin at SaneThinking.com, saying, "Alcohol is not really an enemy so much as a poison. Enemies can be feared but poisons? Hardly. Who in their right mind wants to poison oneself?"

Lola's written a long story with surprise twists for those who can hang in there long enough at L'Undone.

And Joyce, at JoySoriano.com has a different prayer one might consider

TherapyDoc presents Alcoholics Anonymous (A. A.) and W.S.J. posted at Everyone needs therapy, asks "WSJ says AA is okay. Is it?"

Caroline, at SharpBrains thinks that all you need to do is reduce your stress and you'll be just fine. I don't buy it, but okay, take a look.

That concludes this edition. Thanks to all of you who visited and participated. Submit your blog article for the May 13 edition to The Carnival of All Substances.